Tuesday, September 28, 2010

A Lil Somethin' Extra in my News Today

I don't ask for much.  I don't expect much.  That way I'm not disappointed.  I subscribe to our city newspaper even though most of it is news I have already located online. I don't always care for the politics but that's not really relevant to this story.  There is something about physically turning over each page in a newspaper that I find satisfying.  Tactile.  Can't get that from my Kindle. Today I got to the OpEd section of my Dayton Daily Worker News only to find someone had been there prior to me; someone who was eating breakfast.  What's that glob?  Why it's apricot jam.  How interesting.  Devoted Spouse saw me pull out the crutch, the camera, and open the paper and his words were:  "You can tell them you keep me around for my entertainment value."  Oh crap on a crutch.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

It Mocks Me

I am not the world's best gardener.  Not that I don't try, I do.  My thumb seems to be brown, not green.  It is only through the grace of God that flowers and the occasional tomato do arrive in my back yard; not by my hard work.

The other day I noticed a rather large weed growing out of our driveway and I remarked to my husband, "Hmm, look at the size of that weed growing up through the concrete."  That casual remark was designed to spur him to run into the garage and grab the RoundUp weed killer and be manly man and kill that weed.  He was busy and that's okay, too.

This morning, on my way to the car, I noticed that very large weed now had a lovely purple flower on it -- well, would you look at that!!  It's a Morning Glory -- growing right in my driveway.  Oh, by the way, I planted at least a hundred Morning Glory seeds throughout areas of my backyard along the fence and d'ya think any of those grew?  Nope, not a one arrived and let's face it...Morning Glories are the world's simplest flowers to grow next to a dandelion.  No, my Morning Glory was dropped by some flipping bird on its way over my house and this amazing flower is now flourishing in my driveway. I give up.  Oh crap on a crutch...


Wednesday, September 22, 2010

This Ain't No Trading Spaces

I absolutely hate, loathe, and abhor the time period known as 'redecorating'.  Ack.  It's driving me totally over the edge.  My dining room is unusable because it holds all the crap that was in the living room antique armoire.  My living room is unusable because... well...it's still being painted!  What's truly annoying is even though there is just the first coat, these pictures don't show you how lovely this shade of green is. Ack. You will just have to trust me that Mountain Haze from Behr Paint is a gorgeous color for a living room.  I know..I know... it will look better when the furniture arrives and all is put back where it belongs.  In the meantime,  EmmaLou, Golden Destroyer is distraught at being literally barred from both rooms by baby gates. And I can't even use my comfy chair because that will get in the way of Handsome Paint Dude. And, without hurting his feelings, how do I tactfully tell him he missed a spot over here...and over there... and oh gah... oh crap on a crutch... 

This used to be my dining room ACK

Part of my unusable living room & my lonely comfy chair  sob

Not gettin' me up on that ladder, no sir

Friday, September 3, 2010

Yikes! Now I'm Writing Excuses to AMVETS

Yes, once again I find myself having to explain EmmaLou, Golden Destroyer's bad behavior to someone.  Thursday evening I had two large trash bags packed with goodies for AMVETS to pick up.  The bags were placed close to our front door so Devoted Spouse could put them on front porch first thing Friday morning.  The nice AMVETS lady always sends me a postcard which is supposed to be attached to one of the bags.  I attached the postcard and within five minutes I walked back into the foyer to find EmmaLou, Golden Destroyer, had ripped the postcard off the bag and had it in tatters all over the floor.  Out came the scotch tape and I actually found myself writing a note on the card to the nice AMVETS people - "Sorry - Dog chewed card."  I am soon to be the laughing stock of AMVETS.... Oh crap on a crutch!